Ok so I was exploring YouTube this afternoon instead of studying as I should have been and I discovered this word “stud”. What I knew as stud before was a male dog that is used for mating with females, or a really hot, manly guy. Now by no means do I mean to imply that the following definition of “stud” i'm about to talk about is related. So a stud is what I previously knew as a butch lesbian. I came across a video in which two females were questioning how it is possible for a stud to have a baby momma. All I could think was wow, damn good question. I also saw another video in which two females, I’m assuming they were also lesbian, were dancing very provocatively and simulating sex with eachother…but the movements and positions were what you would expect from between male and a female. I sort of had this idea in my head that two females would have sex…let’s say differently, as in not the same things you would see between male and female. Apparently I am totally ignorant on this.
Back to the stud thing: There are some people who are against stud on stud or “dom” on “dom” (as they say in Baltimore) relationships. So that would be two butch females dating. There are also people who are against straight males being attracted to stud/dom/butch females. Now all of this dom, butch, stud thing is a bit confusing. I’m not quite clear on if being a stud means just dressing, acting, wearing hair, having mannerisms of a man or if the person is actually has to be lesbian or bi. But then I suppose a stud could be bisexual and then date a straight guy.
Anyway. It was just funny to me that this certain person thought it was, I think she said, not cute/unattractive/not sexy maybe disgusting? I don’t know, but in other words it was absurd to her that a straight male should want to be with a stud female. The reason I thought it was so funny is that she thought it was worse than her own lifestyle choice which is being a LESBIAN. That means she is attracted to people of the same sex as her the only difference is that they cannot dress or style their hair the same as she does. To me that was absurd. Her sister actually said it would be extra gay for two studs to date, or that it would be gay for a man to be attracted to a stud. Just wow. I don’t get it. It seems that it’s all about outward appearances with some people. Don’t people look any deeper? I understand that you would want to have an attraction to the person you are with, and that will include style of dress, body type etc…but how can someone be so against a relationship between two other people because they basically dress alike. Both dress like boys, for example, even if they are of the opposite sex. I wonder if they would be for a stud female dating a man who dresses and looks like a woman. Would that be OK? Or two fem lesbians?
The lines are so crossed. What makes someone masculine and what makes them a man is not the same thing. It’s almost as if there should be new subcategories of gender added in. There is no longer just male and female, and there apparently is no longer just gay/lesbian/bisexual. If I had time I would make up some kind of flow chart to figure out the whole thing.
I never realized how important CLOTHES are. Well, actually I did because oh Lord did I get the bad end of it in middle school & highschool. I used to dress like a boy, and before that I just wore whatever was given to me from the garage sales at which my aunt tastefully selected oversized t-shirts with other children’s names on them (but that’s another story). Clothing is really important though and I'm not sure that I like that. The stupid thing is we can’t even make the choice for ourselves, what we choose to wear. There are clothes made FOR men and there are clothes made FOR women, and if you happen to wear something that is not from the category into which your genitalia fits, lol, then you will be forever ostracized by society. Who freaking cares? They are just clothes. Just wear what you like. But apparently what you wear says a whole lot about you. Which for some people that may be true, clothing can be a way of expressing oneself, or it could not be. It could be purely functional like uh…I need to cover my body so I don’t get cold or get burnt by the sun or be put into jail or Baker acted for being naked. The psychology of clothing. I’m sure someone out there has studied it. Humans are such funny creatures but I guess that’s what makes us so complex and interesting.
Anyway. I just thought that was interesting. See there is so much I don’t know. Oh, and all of these people were black so I wonder if this is just in the black lesbian community or if it crosses the race lines. But back to the studies. Gotta learn about temperature regulation. Fun stuff.
Monday, November 23, 2009
Friday, November 21, 2008
MILLER TIME
MARY J FUCKING BLIGE. You know I used to love you. I thought you were the queen of hip hop. I thought you had your own style, I thought you were original. But tonight, my little rosy bubble of MJB awesomeness has been busted. Man this almost makes me sad.
So I was listening to the Isely Brothers on Pandora, specifically the song Lets Fall In Love, and I heard this one part of the song,
If you know the song you know the part I'm talking about. And OMG I'm like, I've heard this before but where? Yea its from Mary J Blige's song, The Love I never HAD. Wow:
This happens so often now I'll be listening to an older song and realize damn, so and so stole this and all this time I was thinking it was something new. Well what do you know? It happened again but with someone I totally didn't expect in from. Mary. Damn you Mary Damn you. I'm losing faith in music from today. Is there no originality anymore? Or is it going to be this way forever artists passing off there hottest new hits as their own. I mean where do they recognize the original creators, composers of those hits. And its sad because sometimes they can be littleknown songs.
It's not right. But you know what? I wonder if they do often if not always tribute their songs to the original artist on the album liner information. I wouldn't know because, well hell I haven't bought a cd in like 5 years. I download all the music I have, entire Cd's at times. But anyway that's a whole other story.
I'm just so upset right now I don't know why but I am.
And you know with Mary it's not like she took the whole song, the melody, the baseline, or the rhythm. nothing like that. No just a couple of lines from the song. Gee I wonder how easy that must be. Did she write the song? I'm sure she's aware of the Isely Brothers anyway and she knew what she was doing when she sung it So. HMPH. The blame is still on her. I'm mad at you MARY
WHy WOULd YOU DO THIS TO ME?
So I was listening to the Isely Brothers on Pandora, specifically the song Lets Fall In Love, and I heard this one part of the song,
Everybody needs some one to love
Darling It's you I've been dreaming of
And I wanna be the one you love
The story's been told for me
By the stars Above, stars Above
Darling It's you I've been dreaming of
And I wanna be the one you love
The story's been told for me
By the stars Above, stars Above
If you know the song you know the part I'm talking about. And OMG I'm like, I've heard this before but where? Yea its from Mary J Blige's song, The Love I never HAD. Wow:
Cause Everybody needs someone to love
And I know that its true and I know that its you
And I know that its true and I know that its you
If you listen to the two songs you will know. YOU WILL KNOW SHE STOLE IT!!!
This happens so often now I'll be listening to an older song and realize damn, so and so stole this and all this time I was thinking it was something new. Well what do you know? It happened again but with someone I totally didn't expect in from. Mary. Damn you Mary Damn you. I'm losing faith in music from today. Is there no originality anymore? Or is it going to be this way forever artists passing off there hottest new hits as their own. I mean where do they recognize the original creators, composers of those hits. And its sad because sometimes they can be littleknown songs.
It's not right. But you know what? I wonder if they do often if not always tribute their songs to the original artist on the album liner information. I wouldn't know because, well hell I haven't bought a cd in like 5 years. I download all the music I have, entire Cd's at times. But anyway that's a whole other story.
I'm just so upset right now I don't know why but I am.
And you know with Mary it's not like she took the whole song, the melody, the baseline, or the rhythm. nothing like that. No just a couple of lines from the song. Gee I wonder how easy that must be. Did she write the song? I'm sure she's aware of the Isely Brothers anyway and she knew what she was doing when she sung it So. HMPH. The blame is still on her. I'm mad at you MARY
WHy WOULd YOU DO THIS TO ME?
Monday, October 20, 2008
What is racism, what is not?
What is racism, what is not? Where is the line in the sand drawn. That image of drawing a physical line in the dirt with a stck or a shoe brings back a little nostanlgia. Reminding me of hot summer days at my local recreational centers summer camp. Young middle school boys all pumped up by others watching and geering “Cross this line and I’ll whoop your ass.”
Anyway, doesn’t that same kind of line exist in the adult world in regards to racist remarks? The whole reason I bring this up is because (besides the fact that its something I often wonder about) I was listening to the radio this morning while doing some inanely tedious titrations, and the host of the show made a comment that I was instantly taken aback by. The reason I for my strong reaction was because of the blatant racistness of the comment.
The whole discussion was about Colen Powel’s recent endorsement of Barack Obama. Anywhoo someone called in and said something along the lines of his endorsement will have the effect of getting more support for Obama in the black community. After this the host apparently disagreed with the caller and made a statement, I don’t remember the exact words, But it was something like “Oh yea sure, cuz all the black guys on the south side drinking there forties really care about political issues” Or something like that. Well that truly struck me as racist and I really couldn’t believe he said that on the radio (what racist remarks he makes in his own bedroom….who knows).
But then just when I was about to once again settle on my opinion that most white people really are racist, another caller called in. The guy was a another white republican just like the host and he sort of chided the host in saying “ Hey that comment you just made was kind of messed up.” And the host quickly responded in a tone that said NO IT WASN’T “ Oh haven’t you ever heard of sarcasm man, If you listen to my show you know I use it all the time”
So that sort of calmed me down a little and made me think, hmm maybe he was really being sarcastic not racist. And now that I think about it I’m sure he was. But does that mean the comment still isn’t racist. And does that mean that I as a black American should be upset about it, or should I let it go. How much is too much? I don’t know.
And that made me think well what really is racism. And because someone says something that is racist does that make them a racist.
A lot of people like to go around thinking that racism doesn’t exist, and others like to think that if you ignore it, it will go away (my sister). Well I fully acknowledge the fact that it exists and I can say with honesty that I have been guilty of making certain remarks and having certain thoughts and feelings that are racist. But am I a racist? I don’t think so. I like to try to view people on an individual basis. You can’t group all people into one category just because of the color of there skin, religious background, where they were rased and on and on…But I also believe in statistics so…you know what that means I would say that many people of the opposite skin color of mine (aint that cute) are probably ignorant, and their ignorance may make them racist by default.
And the radio show host, he knew what he was saying would have been a racist remark outside of the context of that whole discussion, but he thought his use of it in a sarcastic way made it ok.
And Im sure he tells himself not all black people act that way and drink forties and are lazy and don’t give a crap about important current events and issues and government (unless they’re inline to get their new EBT card). But so what. And does it make it worse because he said it in public. No I think its bad all around but when its made as a public statement it just magnifies it.
What if it was a white friend of mine (I can’t say that I have any at the moment but if I did…) who made that comment in the same way the radio show host did, would I have been as upset. Probably not. Why because they are my friend and we would probably joke about this kind of stuff all the time (as I do with my friends now).
So that brings up another point, maybe the racism thing is taken too seriously sometimes. But I have a feeling as soon as we start thinking that way we might end up right back where we were and the little old ladies son that lives down the road from me could be entitled to lynch me just because I looked at her dog funny.
It needs to be taken seriously, and why? Because I’m sorry but we are not too far removed from that whole SLAVERY thing. Hello! Both black people and white people and Hispanic and asian and whoever else is living in this country like to sort of forget that it ever happened. And its true it probably doesn’t affect some people as much as others. But it damn sure affects me and my PEOPLE a whole freakin lot!
And now I’m about to go into “hate white people mode” as my good friend likes to call it. But I won’t I’ll calm down because I have to go back to work and I don’t want to end up giving people undeserved evil glares stemming from the despicable thought running through my head….
TO BE CONTINUED
Anyway, doesn’t that same kind of line exist in the adult world in regards to racist remarks? The whole reason I bring this up is because (besides the fact that its something I often wonder about) I was listening to the radio this morning while doing some inanely tedious titrations, and the host of the show made a comment that I was instantly taken aback by. The reason I for my strong reaction was because of the blatant racistness of the comment.
The whole discussion was about Colen Powel’s recent endorsement of Barack Obama. Anywhoo someone called in and said something along the lines of his endorsement will have the effect of getting more support for Obama in the black community. After this the host apparently disagreed with the caller and made a statement, I don’t remember the exact words, But it was something like “Oh yea sure, cuz all the black guys on the south side drinking there forties really care about political issues” Or something like that. Well that truly struck me as racist and I really couldn’t believe he said that on the radio (what racist remarks he makes in his own bedroom….who knows).
But then just when I was about to once again settle on my opinion that most white people really are racist, another caller called in. The guy was a another white republican just like the host and he sort of chided the host in saying “ Hey that comment you just made was kind of messed up.” And the host quickly responded in a tone that said NO IT WASN’T “ Oh haven’t you ever heard of sarcasm man, If you listen to my show you know I use it all the time”
So that sort of calmed me down a little and made me think, hmm maybe he was really being sarcastic not racist. And now that I think about it I’m sure he was. But does that mean the comment still isn’t racist. And does that mean that I as a black American should be upset about it, or should I let it go. How much is too much? I don’t know.
And that made me think well what really is racism. And because someone says something that is racist does that make them a racist.
A lot of people like to go around thinking that racism doesn’t exist, and others like to think that if you ignore it, it will go away (my sister). Well I fully acknowledge the fact that it exists and I can say with honesty that I have been guilty of making certain remarks and having certain thoughts and feelings that are racist. But am I a racist? I don’t think so. I like to try to view people on an individual basis. You can’t group all people into one category just because of the color of there skin, religious background, where they were rased and on and on…But I also believe in statistics so…you know what that means I would say that many people of the opposite skin color of mine (aint that cute) are probably ignorant, and their ignorance may make them racist by default.
And the radio show host, he knew what he was saying would have been a racist remark outside of the context of that whole discussion, but he thought his use of it in a sarcastic way made it ok.
And Im sure he tells himself not all black people act that way and drink forties and are lazy and don’t give a crap about important current events and issues and government (unless they’re inline to get their new EBT card). But so what. And does it make it worse because he said it in public. No I think its bad all around but when its made as a public statement it just magnifies it.
What if it was a white friend of mine (I can’t say that I have any at the moment but if I did…) who made that comment in the same way the radio show host did, would I have been as upset. Probably not. Why because they are my friend and we would probably joke about this kind of stuff all the time (as I do with my friends now).
So that brings up another point, maybe the racism thing is taken too seriously sometimes. But I have a feeling as soon as we start thinking that way we might end up right back where we were and the little old ladies son that lives down the road from me could be entitled to lynch me just because I looked at her dog funny.
It needs to be taken seriously, and why? Because I’m sorry but we are not too far removed from that whole SLAVERY thing. Hello! Both black people and white people and Hispanic and asian and whoever else is living in this country like to sort of forget that it ever happened. And its true it probably doesn’t affect some people as much as others. But it damn sure affects me and my PEOPLE a whole freakin lot!
And now I’m about to go into “hate white people mode” as my good friend likes to call it. But I won’t I’ll calm down because I have to go back to work and I don’t want to end up giving people undeserved evil glares stemming from the despicable thought running through my head….
TO BE CONTINUED
Thursday, October 9, 2008
Why I'm Blogging
I've decided to start blogging for several reasons.
- I want to remember my life. ive found lately that if i try to recall something like what id did two days ago mostly i cant remember. at least the details anyway. and that really sucks. i don't want to be an old woman one day and try to think back over my life and the only thing i can remember is that i went to work and saw a couple of movies. so i am using this as a personal diary...the book of my life.
- i want to share my life with whoever is kind/bored.brave.lonely.interested/whatever enough to read this. i want to shoot out my ideas and thoughts and get opinions. comments insults all that good stuff from other people. and since i am choosing to remain a\semi anonnymous i will be honest and if you respond hopfully you will be honest in return.
- I have just recently embarked on a journey of self improvement. i am about to begin my medical school education....i want to be a better person, I will used the blog to exercise my mind, my thinking ability, improve my vocabulary and writing skills and creativity as well as just follow up on random thoughts and observations i have throughout the day.
one final note i will often use my lg dare to post so i apologize in advance for the numerous typos and misspellings. i will try to go back and correct as many as i can.
- I want to remember my life. ive found lately that if i try to recall something like what id did two days ago mostly i cant remember. at least the details anyway. and that really sucks. i don't want to be an old woman one day and try to think back over my life and the only thing i can remember is that i went to work and saw a couple of movies. so i am using this as a personal diary...the book of my life.
- i want to share my life with whoever is kind/bored.brave.lonely.interested/whatever enough to read this. i want to shoot out my ideas and thoughts and get opinions. comments insults all that good stuff from other people. and since i am choosing to remain a\semi anonnymous i will be honest and if you respond hopfully you will be honest in return.
- I have just recently embarked on a journey of self improvement. i am about to begin my medical school education....i want to be a better person, I will used the blog to exercise my mind, my thinking ability, improve my vocabulary and writing skills and creativity as well as just follow up on random thoughts and observations i have throughout the day.
one final note i will often use my lg dare to post so i apologize in advance for the numerous typos and misspellings. i will try to go back and correct as many as i can.
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